I got a fortune cookie that read "Blessed is he who makes his companions laugh." Well, you all can keep that good luck rolling in to me by enjoying this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl.
1
Now that I am getting on in years, I am a waddler. No longer do I take graceful strides across a walkway. I basically have to pull my legs in place manually and teeter from side to side to get the momentum moving in a forward direction. Think human penguin.
2
Why do people always become kleptomaniacs at restaurants? Like lifting tiny spoons and jars as a hobby? I mean, you could look on Amazon and probably buy what you just stole for under $10. Now, this is not to say I am above it. I might have once shoved a cute, highly functional wine glass in my cleavage when I was drunk, because my birthday-girl friend (equally as drunk) said she wanted it. What can I say? If you got it, use it.
3
I don't understand why people who entertain build big houses. If you enjoy parties so much, just build a mini restaurant and add a few bedrooms and a laundry room around the perimeter. You can jazz up the living room, the dining room, the basement. But when given the choice, EVERYONE comes to the kitchen.
4
Doesn't it suck when you correctly type a really long, challenging word to spell, and you realize you left the caps lock on?
5
I don't know if I am one of the few who enjoys The Flight Attendant on HBOMAX, but it's worth a watch if you're bored. It has, however, made me look at flight attendants in a new light. Like, is every plane a recruiting base for espionage groups? Am I constantly surrounded by undercover or double agents? It's fascinating.
6
Let's talk adjustable straps. Ladies have more experience with this, but even overall, these things need tick marks. Like, show us an even level for adjustment. I am eye-balling this shit with my over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder, and when I'm done, I end up with one tit in my chin and the other at my waistline. It's like looking at a person with a wandering eye - you don't know where to focus!
7
I like to throw away things that are at or nearing the end of their functional life. In turn, I like to stock up on needed supplies before they run out. And I get a sense of anxiety waiting for the old item to finish up, so I can replace it with the new item. But the one thing that always fools me regarding its demise is foam hand soap. I will look at this stuff and say, "yeah, this has maybe one or two more days left, then it's donezo." But two weeks later, I am pressing that pump and soap is STILL coming out! How? There was only a thin layer of liquid left n the bottom. What is making this crap recharge and replenish? This causes quite the conundrum between my need to purge and my need to conserve.
8
I Wordled, Quordled and Heardled yesterday, getting all of them correct before 8:00am, and it gave me a sense of accomplishment that I haven't felt in a good, long while!
9
You all know I am not a fan of Reels. But sometimes, I do attempt to guess what song or movie line they're trying to imitate, without ever clicking on it. They're much more challenging and entertaining when muted.
10
I had a friend who only got one of her twins tested for COVID. When I asked why, she said, "because they're twins." At that point, I also hoped they were adopted. #notfriendsinsouthbury
So, the Derby winner had 80-1 odds of winning, and he pulled that shit off brilliantly. You really don't need to place any bets on what I'll be up to this weekend. But it might interest you to know that I could possibly be drinking while Zumba-ing. Only time will tell. In the meantime, read this short but poignant article that basically validates my existence (If I liked to work out. Which I don't)
A little before, a little after...
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