I don't know about you, but I am seeing pink! That's right, today is the day that The Barbie Movie drops in theaters! Barbie gets a bad rap for a lot of reasons that I don't understand. So, this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl is set to defend this plastic heroine!
1
Barbie's body is bangin'. Is it anatomically accurate? Probably not. But why not offer a figure to which healthy people might aspire? And this chick stays lean without any addiction to alcohol, nicotine or drugs! Dolls don't have to be totally realistic in all ways. They are part of our pretend play. So, if your kid wants to play with a hot chick rather than Frumpy Frannie, I say let them.
2
On the same note, yeah Ken is pretty fine as well. Is this a crime? Moms and dads - do you sit around hoping your kid brings home an acned toad with high trousers? Probably not. If that's where they land, so be it. But why not aspire higher (and by higher, I mean bigger, stronger, longer.)
3
Barbie can literally do ANYTHING she sets her mind to. She can be a teacher, a doctor, a rocket scientist, or she can be a pole-dancing minx that seduces your Elf on the Shelf. Now THAT, ladies and gentleman, is what I call an inspiration.
4
The house where Barbie lives is literally a dreamhouse! Don't begrudge her that success! She and Ken have several high-powered jobs that change daily. And despite the airy nature they portray, they are obviously well-educated, gainfully-employed and deserve all that their wealth can provide.
5
Same with their vehicles. Who else do you know that has a Corvette and VW convertible, a deluxe motor home, a motorcycle, Vespa, luxury yacht and any number of other transportation items at their disposal at any minute? I don't know about you, but I am gunning to be friends with these people!
6
Barbie is about 64 years old now. Man, I can only hope I look that good at her age. And while it is clear that she has had some major work done over the years, she had a damn good plastic surgeon, because it just all looks so natural. And her boobs are still so perky. I think I need this doc's number!
7
Her wardrobe is unparalleled. This girl can go from gingham shorts and tee to haute couture in a matter of minutes. Designers love her so much they design for her. And there are accessories to match every outfit. All in the dreamhouse's closet. I mean, doesn't being someone's muse appeal to you too? Come on, admit it!
8
She has her own color!! Truly. It is a pantone color! What would pink be without Barbie?
9
She has books and movies written about her. Like sooooooo many books and movies. She is a gifted actress, singer, stunt woman - you name it. Barbie can morph into any character, perform in any language, and you still just want to be as cool as her.
10
Barbie is the most faithful mate on the planet. Despite a little side piece with an Australian surfer years ago, she has loyally loved Ken for 60+years. This might have something to do with his ever-present hard bulge, but who knows? He could really just be as nice as his dreamy smile. Join me in wishing this plastic pair a lifetime of bliss!
I'm dolled up in my best pink possessions, on my way to a Barbie-inspired dinner before I hit the theater. This week's drink recipe should come as no surprise!
Dream Cocktail
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