It's certainly May - it MAY rain, it MAY snow or it MAY be 75 degrees. Since you're here, you MAY enjoy this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl.
1
Why is it when you have a day off, the work week seems even LONGER than a regular week?
2
Why do they add pretzels to chip mixes? And if they have to be in there, why are there so many of them? In the hierarchy of salty combo wants, pretzels fall on the bottom rung.
3
I still love doing my daily Wordle. What I don't love is when the word of the day puts a horrific song in your head. Case in point - METRO. After completing this guess, I had that horrible song by Berlin running through my head, all. damn. day.
4
One thing this stout Italian chick cannot understand - how do people live without eating carbs? What joy do these people have in their lives? I mean, seriously, what is the reason for breathing if you can't consume bread and pasta?
5
I was thinking about the phrase "getting screwed." Of course, I was thinking about it in the sexual sense, not like when someone takes advantage of you. The image that appeared in my mind was a man lying on his back, and a woman rotating round and round on his penis. And I feel like if you go to Amsterdam, there are probably little screw toys, doing exactly this action, lining the windows of the Red-Light District. If there aren't, I'm going on "Shark Tank" with a solid business plan in place.
6
My friends send me some of the best memes. So, I dedicate the next two entries to my favorite meme writers of the week. I just bought my husband a "get better soon" card. He's not sick, I just think he could be better.
7
My husband looked at me and said, "drink until you want me." I told him that I can't drink that much.
8
One of my adorable cherubs at school was beaming as he showed me the art project he just finished. He rolled clay to form his name and mounted it on a clay background. Then he painted it black, because black is his favorite color. While the craftsmanship was beautiful, all I could think was that this was a perfect example of what it looks like to write your name in dog shit.
9
You know what's embarrassing? When your kid is blabbing on and on, so your mind checks out, and you start scrolling through your phone, but then he/she/they take a breath and ask you if you are listening. Of course, you say, "of course I am!" Then they ask you to repeat what was just said. #busted
10
Friends who celebrate New Year's Eve with me, I have already planned out the theme for this year - we are all coming dressed up as The Count from Sesame Street and dancing a waltz, because this year, New Year's Eve will be 123123 (12-31-23)!!
It's a glorious year when both St. Patrick's Day AND Cinco de Mayo fall on a Friday. This booze lover is putting the whiskey and beer on the shelf and switching to tequila y cerveza! Las quince bebidas mejores por El Cinco de Drinko estan abajo. Salud!
Bebe, cabron!
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