Oh, hey, it's Thursday! I'm celebrating my freedom to be sarcastic by entertaining you with another version of Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl. Ready?
1
I’m not as worried about leaving my wallet exposed in the car anymore as I am about leaving masks and gloves.
2
So, are like animated characters in movies going to be required to wear masks now too?
3
Who came up with the term “going viral” as a description of popularity? In my day, that pretty much earned you a shot of amoxicillin and a scarlet letter. Was there really no better term?
4
There are a million parking spaces in the lot. But you have to be backing out at the same exact time as the person in back of you. What is the right way to say, “go ahead, buddy, you go first?” And how long are you supposed to wait until somebody effing actually goes?
5
I would proudly wear any of these T-shirts this weekend to support drunk politics in the US.
6
When my kid says, “OK, Boomer” to me, it makes me irate. I am not a Boomer, dammit. I am a proud Gen Xer. So please stop, you ignorant Gen Zer!
7
Also, family, we all know that I’m not a professional chef. So, when I ask you if you’re hungry or what you’re in the mood for, and you say, “I don’t know?,” I’m going to lose my shit. Stop watching YouTube for five seconds and look up a damn recipe.
8
You know that feeling when you finally have a trip planned during a pandemic, and you’re feeling confident about travelling again, and they add your destination to the high-risk list? That’s COVIDPO’d.
9
If you think all these school opening plans are anything more than political fluff to please the public and fill them with false hope, you’re not as smart as you think you are.
10
If you’re not currently stocking up on toilet paper, Clorox wipes and vodka for the next round of this shit, I’ve obviously taught you nothing.
Enjoy this holiday weekend with only your family, and maybe one friend. Plenty of red, white and blue treats out there to keep you numb and dumb! God Bless America!
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