The fabricated Hallmark holiday of love has passed, and now we head into President's Day Weekend. My Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl is its regular jumble of nonsense this week for you to enjoy.
1
I was walking by Health class the other day in my middle school, and the puberty video was playing. Even I got uncomfortable for the poor kids suffering through that with their peers.
2
Does anyone really use those clear straps that are sewn into shirts? I'm sure the thought behind them is great, but I just cut them out. Of course, I wish I was the person who created them, because they are laughing all the way to the bank.
3
Speaking of clothing, why do I feel the need to hang on to certain pieces of clothing? Like, I know my fat ass is never going to fit in this again, but a girl can dream, right? Meanwhile, 10 years later, when I have lost exactly one pound, the thing is ugly, dated and still doesn't fit. #justdonateit
4
Since we're talking clothes, I've noticed something. Even though bright colors look nice on me, my figure is such that I trend toward darker colors. In fact, my wardrobe kinda resembles a bruise. #black #blue #gray
5
Have you ever met a narcissist and wanted to ask, "Where did you get your degree, because you clearly have a Masters in manipulation?"
6
Ever come back to your car, look at your parking job and wonder why someone DIDN'T leave an obnoxious note on it?
7
I was out drinking with friends over the weekend, and one of them told me he was stuffed from all the beer he drank. He went on to say that he'd have to go outside and puke to be able to keep drinking more. So, I told him he was beer-limic.
8
A hypochondriac co-worker was telling me again how they felt ill and were going to test for COVID. Showing no symptoms, I was like, "For God's sake, it's going to be negative." To which they responded, "Well, I see you tested positive for sassy."
9
If the area under your arm is called an arm pit, why isn't the area under your knee called a leg pit?
10
I read this and wished I had thought of it when my kid was little. A mom said she puts on a movie for her kids in a language they don't understand. When they get confused about what's being said, she tells them they must need a nap. After they wake up, she puts the same movie on in English to show them that she was right. #fuckingbrilliant
Finally, Connecticut meteorologists earned their keep by getting the snow forecast right this week. Hoping this laid down some nice powder for you holiday weekend skiers. In case you need ideas for Après Ski, here you go...
After party
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