UCONN did it again this week! Despite living in CT, this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl will demonstrate why I am the national champion of nothing but criticism and complaints.
1
I truly appreciate people's efforts to help me. I know they mean well. But when it takes me 20 minutes to find something in my kitchen, because it was put back in a place that it is not supposed to go, I have a very, very hard time being grateful.
2
Watch all the Tik Toks you want about meal prep. I buy and prep food for my family all the time. But if I don't serve it to them on a silver platter, it rots in my fridge. This is why I decided to buy stock in Post-Its and label every damn thing in my fridge. Hopefully now, the mystique of the very see-through and obvious containers will not mislead them in any way. And if I hear one more time that there's nothing to eat...
3
I am convinced that whoever created Styrofoam is a masochistic loner who has a vendetta against neat, clean people.
4
Who has a connection to "Shark Tank?" I was with my baby cousin this weekend. He was wearing this silicone bib that has a catch-all lip. Anything that fell in there was just scooped back up and eaten. Not to mention the lack of food all over the highchair and the floor. It got me thinking - why don't we have these for adults? Especially for drunk adults. Boozy Bib?
5
I was so proud this week, because I got out of the house quickly and was running ahead of schedule to get to work. Pedal to the metal, I was cruising down the road UNTIL a Mack Truck decides to try and back into a nursery off a main road, two cars in front of me, fucking up my entire morning. #fml
6
This new style of shirt with flowy sleeves is all the rage. That is, until you need to wipe yourself in the bathroom. Like, what do I do with these bells hanging off my arms while I try to wipe my ass? Literally had to pull the thing off, lay it over the TP holder, wipe, then redress. Almost worse than overalls. Not worth the effort.
7
You make lunch in the AM. But then you can't stop thinking about how much you want to eat it now. After staring at it on your passenger seat, you eat it on your drive into work. Then you have no lunch, so you eat a bunch of stale chips you have laying around in your desk.
8
Why can't manufacturers just make product packages that work? Like, how does a pump for face wash make it through functionality testing when it does not bounce back up after you push it down? And it's not like this happened just once. I have been using this product for YEARS, and I'd say every other package has this problem. I even reported it to the company - more than once. But I'm not switching from my cheap, buy-anywhere brand. So, I guess I deserve what I get.
9
I felt really bad at my daughter's tennis match. The two girls she was playing against crossed paths and crashed into each other, but it was kinda silly, and everyone seemed to be laughing at it, so I giggled. What I missed was that while this was happening, the singles player from our team next to them inadvertently hit a ball onto the same doubles court, whacking one my daughter's competitors in the eye at the exact same time the crash happened. The other players from the opposing team gave me a nasty look, and I just said, "sorry, that was funny," thinking that I was referring to the crash, not the eye smash. And now, I am the team Karen.
10
The I-STEM teacher in the room that adjoins our very special classroom, with no closing door in between, is one of those men of few words. However, when he does speak, it's funny. He came in the other day to tell us not to buy any Velcro products. Said that they're a rip-off.
Taxes need to be filed by COB on Monday. Hope you have all your WD-40s ready. Whatever! Just try this recipe for a little tax relief.
Tax relief
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