These gas prices got me like whoa. And they are also bringing me back to the 70s, when my parents smoked an entire pack of cigarettes while the whole family sat in the car for hours, waiting to put gas in our tanks. So, for this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl, I'm doing a little throwback to my childhood as a celebration of why we Gen Xers are the best!
1
We could roller skate like it was nobody's business. O.M.G. - my time at Roller Magic was epic. And even those of us with little-to-no coordination could swerve our legs to skate - both forward and backward. And if you were a guy that could do a split on skates, well, my legs may have been splitting for you in other ways.
2
You actually had the patience to wait for a remote control. Atari (or Intellevision in my house) only came with two remotes. And they were corded. So no matter how badly you wanted to play, there were only two players at one time. You could watch, drink a beer or make out in between games, but you could not always be a part of the game. And that was OK.
3
There was only one phone line in the house. God forbid your sister or brother was talking to his/her significant other - or talking to their bestie about that significant other - there was no hope of you getting your call through. Which caused you to whine to your mother, who took another sip of her adult juice and rolled her eyes, or to your father who yelled and probably smacked you. Which led you to post a phone use sign up near the one phone, which was promptly ripped down by the same brother or sister hogging the phone in the first place. So you stormed out and rode your bike to your friend's house down the street to use his/her phone.
4
You made it through eons in the car without any electronics. Hell, we didn't even know how to use the seatbelts. This car was most likely a station wagon with wood panels on the sides. At least one, if not both, of your parents was a heavy smoker. And you usually took long trips during the hottest months of the year with no air conditioning. Other than your parents bickering, you got to fight with your siblings or stare out the window. And you didn't care, because you were probably driving to the beach or to get ice cream, and that made it all worth it.
5
There were no cartoons on until Saturday morning. And cartoons were important. You could kill at least four hours just staring at the TV for cartoons. And that was also OK, because secretly, "Schoolhouse Rock" taught us everything we know.
6
Our playground equipment could literally paralyze or even kill you. But our parents let us go to the playground, ALONE, and we spun and swung and slid until we had burns on our legs or we puked. And no one called child services or led protests about the quality of our playthings. They were just happy we were out of their hair.
7
We let our moms put bowls on our heads and use the same scissors we used for arts and crafts to cut our hair. And it was actually a real hair style that people wanted! Thank you, Dorothy Hamill, for making us cool.
8
We lived on the edge by eating Pop Rocks and drinking a soda, just to see if our stomachs would explode. Or we had a tea party with Flintstone vitamins as the food served, and we had to get our stomachs pumped. Or we sucked down helium whip its to get high and make our voices even higher, killing whatever brain cells we had left. But, boy, was it fun!
9
Our lunch boxes were metal and featured intricate photos of characters from Happy Days, Star Wars, Fat Albert, The Brady Bunch and Charlie's Angels. We all had our favorite characters from those shows, and we all pretended to be them. The metal outside not only protected the Tang, Pop Tarts and Ring Dings, because there was no way to warm up a Swanson Family Dinner at school, but it also served as a weapon should someone try to take any of your snacks.
10
We perfected the art of taping a song off the radio onto a cassette tape. The anxiety, sweat and sheer determination that went into these productions was honorable. I mean, you had to be home from church in time to even hear the song, had to wait for Rick Dees to finish his spiel and then hit record at the exact moment he stopped talking and the music started, all so you could add this song to a mixed tape to give to your crush. Pure genius.
Sorry, but kids today ain't got nothin' on us. We did all of the above in short shorts and tube socks, wearing no sunscreen, shaking our photos to develop them and sucking on a big blow pop. Oh, and we typed shit that didn't correct itself! So as things seem super bleak in the world right now, remember where we came from and see how far we've come. It's all going to be OK, man.
Groovin' (on a Thursday afternoon)
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